nivrip
Yorkshire Cruncher
- Joined
- Mar 21, 2007
- Messages
- 10,897
- Reaction score
- 2,138
Late last Saturday night; a young chap was walking home
from a club. It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was
tired and freezing.. Most of the streetlights in the area
were broken, and the silence was only broken by the
occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a dustbin.
Then suddenly he heard a strange noise.......
BUMP........
BUMP........
BUMP........
Startled by this, he turned, and to his amazement, through
the driving rain, he saw the faint outline of a large box
turning into his road.
BUMP........
BUMP........
BUMP........
He froze to the spot, he couldn’t believe his eyes, as the
box approached from the shadows, he was able to make out
its shape more clearly....It was a coffin.
Not wanting anything to do with this, he put his head down
and started walking briskly home.
BUMP.........
BUMP........
BUMP........
He could feel the coffin gaining on him, he started walking
faster.........
BUMP........BUMP......
BUMP........BUMP..
BUMP........BUMP.......
The coffin was closing with his every step, he started to
jog, but he heard the coffin speed up after him......
BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...
BUMP.........BUMP...BUMP...
BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...
He started to sprint, but so did the coffin ........
BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.
BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.....
BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.
Eventually he made it to his front door, but he knew the coffin was
only seconds behind. Fumbling around in his pocket, he pulled
out his keys, His hand trembling, he managed to open the lock, he
dived inside slamming the front door behind him. He shot
into his front room, and slumped into his comfy chair.
Suddenly there was a loud crash, as the coffin smashed its
way through the front door. The force of the impact broke the lock
off the coffin allowing the lid to swing freely on its rusty
hinges as it continued its chase.....
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH....
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...
In horror the young lad fled again, as fast as his shaking
legs could take him he bolted upstairs to the bathroom and
locked the door........
BUMP...SCREECH....HOP..BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...
BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...BUMP...SCREECH....HOP...
BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...
The coffin again gave chase up the stairs, across the landing and
launched itself at the bathroom door. With an almighty smash, the
bathroom door flew off its hinges.... The coffin stood in
the doorway, then started to approach the young terrified
lad.
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP.SCREECH...
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...
In a last ditch attempt to save his skin, he reached for
his bathroom cabinet...... He grabbed a bar of Imperial
Leather soap and threw it at the coffin.......still it came
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...
He grabbed his can of Lynx deodorant and threw it
.....still it came......
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP.SCREECH...
He grabbed his first aid kit and threw it ......still it
came.......
BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...
With his last desperate throw of the dice, he threw a bottle of
Benylin at it....
The coffin stopped.
