AnthonyB said:
Have you read the recommendations that came from the lady who studied
child molesteres for years, impersonating children she would
infiltrate these rings so she could find out how they were coaxed
into it bit by bit, their methods and why they were successufl, many
of the victims were from happy households, however the major factors
that the victims had in common were.
1)All hour, or long term unsupervised, unfetterd access to the
internet. 2)All hour, or long term unsupervised access to a mobile
phone 3)Access to leave their home without detection, or with little
chance of being caught out if giving reasons.
I would never let my 7 year old walk around unsupervised why would I
let him on the net and the chat rooms unsupervised, I wouldn't let my
13 year old out without knowing exactly where they had been, why
would I let them on the internet without knowing exactly where they
had been. I don't want to know exactly what they have been doing and
saying to their friends etc. but I want to know who those friends are
and where they have been.
Y'know, people who use electronics to babysit their children will reap
what they sow.
Using the internet to keep ones children occupied is no different than
using television. No one said that limiting a child's time on the
computer is bad.
But if you play Sherlock Holmes with your kids instead of forming a
relationship with them that includes dialog on all subjects, you will
pay for it. Teaching kids that violating someone's privacy is okay is a
bad lesson for later life. Teaching kids that he who has the power makes
the rules--regardless of how onerous, burdensome and oppressive--sets
them up for exploitation. Parents just don't realize that the habits we
form early in life--how we react to all classes of situations--follow us
forever.
And sometimes parents just don't think.
When I was 12, a Princeton University student lived up the road. One day
when I was riding my bicycle, the chain fell off and when he saw me by
the side of the road, he came out and fixed it. Why did he take an
interest in a 12-year old? Because he had a passion, and he loves to
teach and because (from what I've read recently) befriends others
easily. He offered to take me birdwatching. This is a rural area (even
now, I see foxes and deer and wild turkey and hawks in the woods when I
look out my bedroom window), so it was good for that.
Anyway, my mother said no.
I managed to stay friends with him for the time he was here, and he
taught me a lot of interesting things in spite of the limitations. I
googled him the other day, and he is now one of the most highly
acclaimed ornithologists in his field--oft-published and internationally
known.
And I had and lost an opportunity to learn from him in the area for
which he has become famous.
If parents are going to limit their children, they need to be very sure
about the limits they place, or the opportunities they could foreclose
are incalculable. And they may also fail to recognize the real dangers
to their children, because most often those dangers come from trusted
sources.
The lady you cite was studying a particular phenomenon, and those are
her conclusions for that particular subgroup. But most children are
molested by close friends and family members, not by strangers.
rl