Good Morning Jobseekers

[paulines_pens]

Thanks for all the nice hellos


For those who are not aware Pauline is the character out the League of Gentlemen who works in the job centre and is obsessed with pens. I call everyone Pauline who works in the job centre.

Yeah Tranmere Rovers is the local team here and I can see The River Mersey and Liverpool Skyline outside my bedroom and lounge windows.

I will check crunchers corners when I get off my backside and get a phone line put into my flat and get back online.

 

[TriplexDread]

Well just hurry up and get ya arse into gear lad

 

[marleyuk]

Yeah Tranmere Rovers is the local team here and I can see The River Mersey and Liverpool Skyline outside my bedroom and lounge windows.

haha can you see me waving? As ive decided to quit my job today im actually getting a job in the Royal Sun Alliance in town. I sure you'll be able to see me doing little/nothing in there.


Edit - I bet you cant see the ferry! its on strike today.

 

[TriplexDread]

What you gonna be doin in RSA then?

 

[marleyuk]

Hopefully little as possible. Im meant to be on a work placement but its hell on earth. So in about 10 minutes im gonna go explain to the boss that its not working out.

I think its like data entry or something in the RSA, ive got a few mates there. Weekend pay is £13 an hour and for starving students like myself, this sounds good.

 

[TriplexDread]

Thats decent money m8. Maybe you should stick with it for a while?

 

[marleyuk]

Its £13 in the RSA, here its £5.20 and im designing high end databases for an idiot of a boss. Im looking forward to 6th months of easy work until im back at uni.

 

[TriplexDread]

Ahhh I c. Well good luck

 

[marleyuk]

What does everyone else work as??

 

[ChristopherP]

I work at Sainsbury's, get £5.84 an hour base pay but can get half that again for unsociable hours (Friday night/saturday night/sunday - of which i work none of them)

Until i wrote a 4 page letter to the MD of Sainsbury's, Mr Justin King, i was on checkouts. Now i work in various roles and have single handedly designed the entry system for the exit interviews. They dont realise it is so time consuming and the lawyers are coming in tomorrow to look at it... it's not finished... so i'll be there until the early hours of tomorrow morning i expect.

 

[marleyuk]

Yeah it really is. My latest project was a database that had to query dynamic data. Hell on earth.

Because there was so many stupidly variable bits of data, it was hard to tell it what to query. Even worse is the actual output can be worked out manually pretty quickly.

 

[itsme]

Hello from ME2

 

[paulines_pens]

Marley I can see you waving from my Window......

Are you sure you don't work for the Job Centre sitting there with all your pens laid out on your desk doing nothing.

 

[paulines_pens]

I worked once now I am dole scum


I used to work for a bank on the fraud side of the cards that was my last job.

 

[marleyuk]

Was that until you where convicted of fraud?

I just sat an IQ test and scored 124. Considering i didnt put to much into it im impressed. I just checked and heres a table of whats what.

Grade Range Percent
Genius >144 0.13%
Gifted 130-144 2.14%
Above average 115-129 13.59%
Higher average 100-114 34.13%
Lower average 85-99 34.13%
Below average 70-84 13.59%
Borderline low 55-69 2.14%
Low <55 0.13%

Considering its been a while since i last did any real maths thats quite good . With a couple of practice runs im thinking i could hit 130.

 

[paulines_pens]

Was that until you where convicted of fraud?

I just sat an IQ test and scored 124. Considering i didnt put to much into it im impressed. I just checked and heres a table of whats what.

Grade Range Percent
Genius >144 0.13%
Gifted 130-144 2.14%
Above average 115-129 13.59%
Higher average 100-114 34.13%
Lower average 85-99 34.13%
Below average 70-84 13.59%
Borderline low 55-69 2.14%
Low <55 0.13%

Considering its been a while since i last did any real maths thats quite good . With a
couple of practice runs im thinking i could hit 130.

No I relocated and I wasn't happy with the job, they were more obessed with usless statistics then fighting fraud.

In fact they had a whole department that monitored useless statastics.

 

[marleyuk]

Are you surgesting my pointless IQ test was well, pointless?

 

[paulines_pens]

Are you surgesting my pointless IQ test was well, pointless?

Yeah like showing Neighbours twice a day.

 

[murdoch]

a real job

What does everyone else work as??

Well i used to work with 3 friends from back in my days from Nam, but in 1972 we got sent to prison by a military court for a crime we did not commit. We escaped from the maximum security stockade to the London Underground. Today, still wanted by the government, we survive as ticket collectors on the district line and if we find you may be you can pay a £30 fine.

 

[Rush]

FIRST OF ALL...

Chrispostill ...you will be earning mega bucks soon ...trust me
Murdoch ...

Well i used to work with 3 friends from back in my days from Nam, but in 1972 we got sent to prison by a military court for a crime we did not commit. We escaped from the maximum security stockade to the London Underground. Today, still wanted by the government, we survive as ticket collectors on the district line and if we find you may be you can pay a £30 fine.

you still make me laugh