What generalmoters said after reading these groups

D

dave,norwich,uk

JUST ABIT OF LIGHT ENTERTAINMENT (HOPE NO ONE MINDS)



GM's response to Bill Gates comments ..Just for a laugh......

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way
computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo
COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto
industry and stated;

"If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we
would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release
stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars
with the following characteristics:

1.. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2.. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy
a new car.
3.. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You
would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows,
shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could
continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4.. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause
your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to
reinstall the engine.
5.. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable,
five times as fast and twice as easy to drive but would run on only five
percent of the roads.
6.. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning
light.
7.. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8.. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out
and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle,
turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9.. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how
to
drive all over again, because none of the controls would operate in the
same manner as the old car.
10.. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off. And if
you couldn't turn it off, you would have to, close all of the windows,
reopen the windows. Then turn it off.
 
K

Kevin Spencer

This joke is roughly 5 years old. It was funny 5 years ago, when it had some
resemblance to the Windows operating systems available 5 years ago.

--

Kevin Spencer
Microsoft MVP
..Net Developer
http://www.takempis.com
Neither a follower nor a lender be.
 
C

Craig Schiller

It's still funny.

And it's still true.

Kevin said:
This joke is roughly 5 years old. It was funny 5 years ago, when it had some
resemblance to the Windows operating systems available 5 years ago.

--

Kevin Spencer
Microsoft MVP
.Net Developer
http://www.takempis.com
Neither a follower nor a lender be.
 
J

Jim Cheshire

I cannot remember the last time that Windows crashed on me. I literally
can't.

Microsoft has released some pretty sad OSes in its history (such as Windows
Me), but Windows XP and Windows Server 2003 are by far the best operating
systems the computer world has ever seen. Anyone who takes an objective
view of them will agree. Those who don't obviously won't. :)

--
Jim Cheshire
Jimco Add-ins
Add-ins for FrontPage 2000-2003
http://www.jimcoaddins.com
===============================
Co-author of Special Edition
Using Microsoft FrontPage 2003
 
K

Kevin Spencer

Yes, in fact at the last MVP Summit, we were shown statistics that prove
that MS operating systems are now the most stable and secure in the world.
Because 90% of the OS's in the world are Microsoft, you hear about the flaws
in them on the news all the time, and don't hear about the others. But the
stats don't lie.

--
HTH,

Kevin Spencer
Microsoft MVP
..Net Developer
http://www.takempis.com
Neither a follower nor a lender be.
 
T

Tom Pepper Willett

Something to troll about?

--
------------------------------
Tom Pepper Willett
Microsoft MVP - FrontPage
------------------------------
| uhhh.... so why are you using Windows, then?
|
| Bob Lehmann
|
| | > It was funny then, it's funny now.
| >
| > It was true then, it's true now.
| >
| > Kevin Spencer wrote:
| >
| > > This joke is roughly 5 years old. It was funny 5 years ago, when it
had
| some
| > > resemblance to the Windows operating systems available 5 years ago.
| > >
| > > --
| > >
| > > Kevin Spencer
| > > Microsoft MVP
| > > .Net Developer
| > > http://www.takempis.com
| > > Neither a follower nor a lender be.
| > >
| > > | > > > JUST ABIT OF LIGHT ENTERTAINMENT (HOPE NO ONE MINDS)
| > > >
| > > >
| > > >
| > > > GM's response to Bill Gates comments ..Just for a laugh......
| > > >
| > > > For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the
way
| > > > computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer
expo
| > > > COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with
the
| > > auto
| > > > industry and stated;
| > > >
| > > > "If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry
has,
| we
| > > > would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the
gallon."
| > > >
| > > > In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press
release
| > > > stating:
| > > >
| > > > If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be
driving
| > > cars
| > > > with the following characteristics:
| > > >
| > > > 1.. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
| > > > 2.. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would
have
| to
| > > buy
| > > > a new car.
| > > > 3.. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason.
| You
| > > > would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the
| windows,
| > > > shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you
could
| > > > continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
| > > > 4.. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would
| cause
| > > > your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would
| have
| > > to
| > > > reinstall the engine.
| > > > 5.. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was
| > > reliable,
| > > > five times as fast and twice as easy to drive but would run on
only
| five
| > > > percent of the roads.
| > > > 6.. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights
would
| all
| > > be
| > > > replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation"
| warning
| > > > light.
| > > > 7.. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
| > > > 8.. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock
you
| out
| > > > and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
| handle,
| > > > turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
| > > > 9.. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to
| learn
| > > how
| > > > to
| > > > drive all over again, because none of the controls would operate
in
| the
| > > > same manner as the old car.
| > > > 10.. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine
off.
| And
| > > if
| > > > you couldn't turn it off, you would have to, close all of the
windows,
| > > > reopen the windows. Then turn it off.
| > > >
| > > >
| > > >
| >
|
|
 
A

Alvin Bruney

Craig you are a microsoft bigot.
Your bigotry is also unfounded if you are using NT based OS. Please update
your knowledge.
 
C

Craig Schiller

Look, Sparky. You're a Microsoft hugger and I'm not.

Let's just let it go and make peace, okay?

Craig
 
S

Steve Easton

If you're not a Microsoft hugger, why don't
your run your Mozilla on Lindows instead
of Windows???
 
B

Bob Lehmann

Maybe his mommy and daddy won't buy it for him. So he's settling on being a
poser until he makes enough his paper route to buy it himself.

Bob Lehmann
 
S

Steve Easton

Either that or the fact that anything else requires more
than Plug N Play / Point and Click to install and operate.
 
C

Craig Schiller

There's a useful suggestion. Thanks, Steve.

Steve said:
If you're not a Microsoft hugger, why don't
your run your Mozilla on Lindows instead
of Windows???
 
C

Craig Schiller

Ooh. Another good one. You're hot today!

Bob said:
Maybe his mommy and daddy won't buy it for him. So he's settling on being a
poser until he makes enough his paper route to buy it himself.

Bob Lehmann
 
C

Craig Schiller

There's a useful suggestion. Thanks, Steve.

Steve said:
If you're not a Microsoft hugger, why don't
your run your Mozilla on Lindows instead
of Windows???
 
C

Craig Schiller

Ooh. Another good one. You're hot today!

Bob said:
Maybe his mommy and daddy won't buy it for him. So he's settling on being a
poser until he makes enough his paper route to buy it himself.

Bob Lehmann
 

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