nivrip
Yorkshire Cruncher
- Joined
- Mar 21, 2007
- Messages
- 10,889
- Reaction score
- 2,138
1. To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
2. A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, 'What's with these guys?
We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!' The doctor chimed in, 'I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!' The pastor said, 'Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him.' 'Hi, George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?'
The greens keeper replied, 'Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters who lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime.'
The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, 'That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight.' The doctor said, 'Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them.' The engineer said, 'Why can't these guys play at night?'
3. Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, 'It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints.' Another said, 'No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections.' The last said, 'Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?
4. 'Normal people ... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.'
2. A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, 'What's with these guys?
We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!' The doctor chimed in, 'I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!' The pastor said, 'Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him.' 'Hi, George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?'
The greens keeper replied, 'Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters who lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime.'
The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, 'That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight.' The doctor said, 'Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them.' The engineer said, 'Why can't these guys play at night?'
3. Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, 'It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints.' Another said, 'No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections.' The last said, 'Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?
4. 'Normal people ... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.'
