Excerpts from job applications

Taffycat

Crunchy Cat
Joined
Jun 1, 2006
Messages
12,573
Reaction score
1,055
These are from our friends across the Pond. :D

"Seek challenges that test my mind and body, since the two are usually inseparable."

"My experience in horticulture is well-rooted."

"Work History: Performed brain wave tests, 1879-1981."

"Extensive background in public accounting. I can also stand on my head!"

"Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school."

"Excellent memory; strong math aptitude; excellent memory; effective management skills; and very good at math."

"Personal Goal: To hand-build a classic cottage from the ground up using my father-in-law."

"Typing Speed: 756 wpm."

"Objectives: 10-year goal: Total obliteration of sales and federal income taxes and tax laws."

"Fortunately because of stress, worked in the cardiac intensive-care ward."

"Work Experience: Dealing with customers' conflicts that arouse."

"Special skills: Thyping."

"I am quick at typing, about 25 words per minute."

"I am a rabid typist."

"Skills: Operated Pitney Bones machine."

"Special Skills: Speak English."

"Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer."

"My ruthlessness terrorized the competition and can sometimes offend."

"Work history: Bum. Abandoned belongings and led nomadic lifestyle."

"I like slipping and sliding around behind the counter and controlling the temperature of the food."

"Experience: Watered, groomed, and fed the family dog for years."

"Special skills: I've got a Ph.D. in human feelings."

"My contributions on product launches were based on dreams that I had."

"I have a bachelorette degree in computers."

"I eat computers for lunch."

"Married, eight children. Prefer frequent travel."
 

cirianz

Chatter Box
Joined
Oct 6, 2005
Messages
2,390
Reaction score
13
:lol: rabid typist :lol: Yep, that's me, the job market will snap me up ;)
 
Top