If you want to change the Recycle Bin icon, go to Display>Desktop>Customize.
You can change the icons there.
I assume that "of my desktop" really means "off my desktop" and you would
prefer to not have the Recycle Bin visible. I don't know why you say it is
impossible; a Google Search for "remove Recycle Bin from desktop XP"
brought me over a million links. Here's one that looks useful: